Teaching Modesty, Modest Prom Dresses and Modest Clothing
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Is Modesty An Issue For Today's Youth?
If you are uncertain as to the question posed, take a day and visit your local high school. Living in sunny Southern California, I am always amazed at how wearing so little clothing is acceptable as the fashion of today. More and more skin is shown as skirts, shirts, and shorts become smaller and smaller.
The pop culture and the entertainment industry have stretched the standards of dress to the limit. "Being in fashion" and "fitting in" are important issues that face our teens today, forcing them to even choose clothing that they themselves may feel uncomfortable with. Teaching modesty in dress, language and behavior in general is a challenge that all parents face.
Modest Prom Dresses can be found...
Are uniforms theanswer to modesty issues?
Dress codes and uniforms are helping address the issue of immodesty in our schools.
Modesty in dress is more than just a religious issue; it is a healthy choice in so many other ways as well. The manner in which one chooses to dress can be a distraction in the working place as well as in the school. Dress codes, which require more modest clothing, are becoming more popular with educators everywhere, especially in the private sector which is more easily mandated, to facilitate less focus on fashion and more focus on learning. More and more school districts are requiring uniforms to alleviate the problems of immodesty in the school.
Jason Evert - Why Modesty?
- Helping Kids Dress Modestly
But what is a dad to do other than sigh, complain about it and shell out the cash for the latest clothing rage? - Real Love Productions
Dressing Modestly vs. Dressing "Dumpily" Your body was created in the image and likeness of God. Dress that way. - Modesty - The Undressing Of Our Youth
I would like to address this article to dads and husbands in particular. We tend to blame the women for how they dress, but I think in doing so we ignore the responsibility of the males. Dads, you need to be more jealous of your women.
Teaching that self respect is important in all aspects of life, Girls Gone Mild, is a new group to look for. Brooke White also radiates modesty.
Another reason for encouraging modesty in dress is out of self respect. The manner, in which we dress and attend to our personal grooming, sends off signals to the world around us. Our appearance identifies us with certain manners of behavior and creates expectations in those around us. Brooke White from American Idol for example stands out because of her modest dress standards, and becomes an example of modesty for the world to see.
Our appearance and their expectations may influence our own behavior. Teaching our youth to have a healthy level of self-worth can be one way to discourage immodesty in dress. Helping them to be happy with themselves can remove the desire to dress like someone or something they are not.
Some great resources for modest prom dresses.
- *Jen* | Modest Prom Dresses
Modest prom dress tips. Find a modest prom dress. - ModestProm.com - Modest Prom Dresses and More!
Lots of links to places where you can buy modest prom dresses; information on affordable modest prom dresses; using boleros & shrugs to make prom dresses modest; alterations for modest prom dresses; and how to make your own modest prom dress. - ModestFeminineAttire
Your resource page for modest & feminine clothing for yourself and your family!
Finding Modest Clothing On line
Shopping for modest clothing is another issue altogether. In most cases fewer and fewer choices are available to meet the modesty standards you may find acceptable. Everyday wear is a challenge in itself, but with Prom season fast approaching the dilemma arises as to how you can help your teen find a modest dress, and WHERE can you look to actually find one. Until the "malls" and other stores make modesty more available, many good resources can be found on the internet.
Modest is hottest!
Modest is beautiful.
More places to find modest dresses...
- Modest Wedding Dresses and More | Beautifully Modest
Find modest wedding dresses, prom dresses, day dresses, bridesmaid dresses, formal dresses and more here at Beautifully Modest. - Modest Wedding Dresses, Modest Bridal Gowns, Modest Bridesmaid Dress, Modest Prom Dress, LatterDayBr
Modest Wedding Dresses, Modest Wedding Gowns, Modest Bridesmaid and Prom Formalwear, Temple Invitations for LDS Weddings - http://www.modestdress.com/
Links for several different shops that carry modest formal attire. - Style Chic: Modest Prom Dresses
Whether youre looking for your own special prom dress or youre helping your daughter, Style Chic knows how hard it can be to find a dress thats in style and modest. Resources to find that dress.
Ways to Dress Modestly by Jami Elsmore
Buy several long tank tops in different colors that you can tuck into your pants so your tummy won't show with a shorter shirt.
Sew a strip of fabric onto the bottom of shorter shirts.
If a shirt is mostly cotton, buy a size larger than you normally would so when you wash it, it won't be too tight or too short.
Buy long boy's shorts when they are available during the summer.
If the top part of a dress is immodest, consider cutting off the top and altering the dress to make a fancy skirt; then find a nice top to match.
Start shopping early for the prom and other special events so you won't be tempted to buy something immodest at the last minute.
Dressing modestly can be done!
Although dressing modestly is definately a challenge for the world today, I know it can be done. As a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, a Mormon, I believe that modesty is an important issue facing each of us. As members of the church we are given guidelines for our youth to follow in a pamphet called For the Strength of Youth.
Mormon Church views on modesty
It States:
"Immodest clothing includes short shorts and skirts, tight clothing, shirts that do not cover the stomach, and other revealing attire. Young women should wear clothing that covers the shoulder and avoid clothing that is low-cut in the front or the back or revealing in any other manner. Young men should also maintain modesty in their appearance. All should avoid extremes in clothing, appearance, and hairstyle. Always be neat and clean and avoid being sloppy or inappropriately casual in dress, grooming, and manners. Ask yourself, ‘Would I feel comfortable with my appearance if I were in the Lord's presence?' "
President Gordon B. Hinckley Councils:
"Modesty in dress and manner will assist in protecting against temptation. It may be difficult to find modest clothing, but it can be found with enough effort. ... You can be attractive without being immodest. ... Draw some rigid parameters, a line in the sand, as it were, beyond which you will not go."
Modesty - A Guy's View
It is a parents responsibility to teach correct principles and be an example.
We can teach our teens to value themselves, and to feel comfortable with who they are. We can teach them to be "trend" setters and not "followers" in the fashions of today. Let's make a difference in the way the world dresses by dressing modestly ourselves and teaching our teens to follow in that pattern.
Oh, yeah... And Good Luck With That Prom Dress!
Modest Bathing Suits are also possible.
- Modests One Piece Bathing Suits and Tankinis Really Do Exist!
A resource for finding a modest bathing suit, as summer is on the way.
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Congrats on the nomination Doghouse. Great hub. I shouldn't have to worry about this for another 17 yrs, but it already worries me.
Prom dresses are hard to find. Thanks for the links.
Hey Doghouse, this is a wonderful hub! I am already dealing with the modesty issue with my 8 year-old. She already wants to wear tank tops and shirts that show her belly. This is such a huge issue for young women and I think you are right - you need to start this teaching them about modesty early.
Good luck and congrats on top five :)
Interesting topic - in general I'd say skirts are a whole lot longer than they were in the 60's - and the v.short ones these days tend to be worn with bike pants under anyway. Personally I think anyone over the age of 8 showing their belly probably looks pretty gross. I live in a currently hot part of Australia and I think in general the dress standards are probably better then they were 20 or 30 years ago - I am yet to see any topless girls on the beach and thongs are rare - probably beause its a surf beach and u need reasonably robust clothing to be wearing it once you come out! I also think the skin cancer message is starting to get thru - as an atheiest aMormon would probably think my swimming atire of shorts and long sleeved top to the neck as very modest - to me its just saves a whole lot of suntan lotion!
Congratulations doghouse... you have worked very hard for this:-) I am glad you have been recognized.
Having raised three daughters and given away three brides... also having six grandchildren who are also female - I am an expert in this area of modesty - from a Mormon's perspective!
tDMg
LdsNana-AskMormon
A great idea for a hub... you have such a variety of them! Thanks :)
Hey Doghouse... love this Hub. I have linked over to you from my Hub on Mormon Youth doing extraordinary things, etc... I just wrote about the fact that they are doing their own Proms now! Cool huh?
tDMG
LdsNana-AskMormon
Hi Doghouse... I see you found my Hub on modest bathing suits! LOL The search is over... Yeah! Thanks for linking over. I appreciate the great information that you have provided here about modesty and the availability for modest clothing. More manufacturers will need to start meeting the needs of these amazing young women who are choosing to go modest!
You rock.
Write On!
Hi Doghouse - thanks for the kind words. I like this Hub too and will also link. It's a good idea for us to help readers find as much information as possible.
Thank you doghouse for making this courageous and important statement. Our youth are bombarded with baring their bodies at every media point and in their circle of friends. Sexy is much more than revealing skin, keeping the body covered and letting attraction come from the soul and personality is giving kids a chance to form lasting relationships.
Great research on your part and this should be an early point of reference for parents of young children...so much easier to form habits then, as teens automatically reject parental guidance...I love the girls Gone Mild -- IT'S HIP.
=) Marisue
Great hub, Doghouse! My church teaching job is over 8-11 year old girls. We had a fashion night where we had each girl come in their favorite ***MODEST*** outfit and put on a fashion show. Then we made posters from fashion catalogs with the guideline that every outfit had to be modest. The girls went home with decals for their bathroom mirrors that said "MODEST IS THE HOTTEST". These were graciously provided by someone else in our congregation. My daughter affixed her decal to the mirror, and her 13-year old babysitter came over and thought it was so cool, she went home and wrote it on her bathroom mirror, too. That's one form of vandalism I approve of! If you can make modesty hip, then you can make self-respect hip too!
This is a great website & so true! There is one GREAT website that has modest, Modern (the combination is truly hard to find) shirts for woman.
JustLongShirts.com has created a fusion between modesty and contemporary design! Their shirts are truly distinctive, offering longer lengths with style and flare. From embroidered tunics, embossed ribbon shirts to casual long tees, you are sure to find something for just for you.
I love wearing sleeveless! Does that count? But yes, sexy doesn't have to be almost "naked." I have always loved the idea of simplicity and elegance. Thanks for this hub Diana. I remember my prom dress and how I got chosen to be prom queen. HAHAHA I should email you that picture (modest one) ...maybe you would like it and post it here. LOL
You would...??? Well, I will have to look for it and scan it for your approval. I was skinny then LOL Okay, I will send you the email once I find the picture.
As a teacher, I am all in favor of school uniforms. I believe that as long as there are no "hand-me-downs" and tattered uniforms being given to the economically poorest families, these can be the great equalizer in any school system.
Yes, I teach in public schools, and I am more Liberal on many other issues, but that doesn't prevent me from using my brain and seeing a good idea when it comes along!
So many of the young girls, and boys too, dress like they are auditioning for a porno movie! I am shocked at times that parents will allow their daughters to leave the house dressed like they were going off to be the top performers at a strip club!
I also learned that some parents simply think they are powerless to prevent this, and some even think they are being "cool" by not helping their children make better choices.
And some are simply fooled - their kids leave modestly dressed, but change clothing before they get to school.
Recently in the news there were images of students "dancing" as if they were having sex! And this was either not stopped by school officials, or condoned by them!
I believe that we parents need to be more involved in our childrens' choices and impose a dress code of our own, and then enforce it, with strict, fair consequences if the kids fail to follow it. We are the parents, after all - aren't we supposed to be the prime role models & care-givers???
Here's an idea that I think LDS girls could use when they look for modest clothes, especially modest prom dresses: Check out Muslim clothing websites. While Muslim women are stereotypically covered from head to foot and only eyes are visible, their level of observance varies and there are stores and companies that cater to that demand. Out of curiosity I once went on the hunt for evening dresses on Muslim clothing websites and there are some alluring yet completely modest ensembles out there! Muslim women may be our best allies in our struggle for modesty!
This isn't just a mormon issue either. I have a daughter who we've gone to great lengths to teach about human sexuality and the costs associated with hanging your identity and self-esteem on physical attributes. Relying on body for respect is a recipe for disaster all on its own that doesn't even need divine penalties to make it something to avoid. For 1, every woman has all the same parts, so, you're not going to say anything unique about yourself to the world by hoisting up another pair of boobs. But 2, and more important, attaching your sense of self worth to your body means your going to be let down eventually. Some of us hold up aesthetically longer than others, but, most of us wilt pretty quick come marriage and kids. And accidents happen that are disfiguring too. An investment in mind is where it's at for long term happiness. We've always encouraged our daughter to ground herself in her intellect. That will server her all of her life. Sure, people like to look at a pretty, half bared woman, but they respect doctors, lawyers and professors more.
It says:
Ask yourself, ‘Would I feel comfortable with my appearance if I were in the Lord's presence?' "
Some people are not aware that we are ALWAYS in the Lord's presense. On the other hand, He knows the real us-- and that can't be hidden from Him.
A great place for modest swimsuits is layersclothing.com.
I think everyone is right. Modesty should be a societal issue. If the concern is that teenagers are growing up too fast, and experienceing sexuality too early - why not look to what in society encourages this. One of the things is the way people dress. If you dress like a prostitute, people are going to think of sex around you. If you dress modestly, people will look at you as a person and not an object. The way modesty is under-rated in our society can been seen on television, movies, and in magazines. Modesty is more than just choices in clothing, it is a way of living that brings the attention to you as a person, instead of you as a sex object. One of the reasons I believe that Mormons have such strong marriages is because the husband and wife learn to look at each other as people first, and sexual beings second. This is because of modesty standards for actions and clothing. If this were true for everyone, I think marriages would be stronger, and families would be stronger.
We sell a lot of great modest wedding dresses.
So very true. I'm thankful that my 12 year old daughter is very modest and would rather die then go out showing too much.
I agree with the poster above that Muslim women are great allies for other seeking styles with more coverage. There are some true trailblazers who are proving that one can be fashionable and fabulous within any guidelines that go with your personal beliefs. One example is my fellow New Jersian designer whose site is http://maraboonline.com/ She's got some adorable takes on recent trends. While my style isn't quite as conservative as hers, I love seeing kindred spirits who go for a chic and classy take on what's in style now.
Jessica Rogers
Owner, Sakura Rose Boutique
www.sakurarose.com
Here in Silicon Valley, the peer pressure for teens to dress the right brand is enormous. When my daughter was a high school senior I helped her with a project. We sew brand patches into WalMart low cost clothing and then presented brand clothing without the patches. 70% of the students could not figure out which was what and the sweatshirt that got voted as the best looking number one item was actually one from WalMart. I was glad my daughter had this project. It changed her point of view. Modest, low cost prom dresses are very often more flattering than the revealing high end items, the Hollywood socialites want our daughters to buy.
I love going to formal dances and wearing modest dresses! Modest truly is hottest- I always get tons of comments on my outfit because it is different than the usual, revealing dresses. I was wondering if you had the brand or website for the second prom dress pictured here (the dark greenish dress). I'm still searching for the prefect modest dress for this year's prom and that dress is one of my favorites that I've seen. Thank you!
Please, where do you find that lovely dark moss green dress? I've been looking all over the listed web sites and can't find it anywhere!
As a college-age young woman, I have to say I was fairly skeptical when I came across this hub. I definitely am seeing the benefits of modesty in the clothing of young women today, but I also feel as though "modesty" is a subjective term. While I don't feel as though I ever really push the envelope with my style of dress, I'm sure a few of the people that have made comments on this list would disagree with me. However, would those that saw me in a dress they believed to be a little too short or in a top they considered to be somewhat too low judge me on that basis? I know that first impressions are incredibly important, but isn't your judgement of young women in a world where they are already under fire for the way they look a little hypocritical? I understand it is for the importance of the self esteem of young women for them to dress in a way that gives them confidence, and I completely agree with the fact that those who dress provacatively because of peer pressure should understand that this is not the way to boost their self esteem.
Young women should dress in a way that makes them feel good about their bodies and themselves, but if the way they choose to dress seems more provacative than what some of you would like, what happens then?
Teaching modesty is all well and good, don't get me wrong I'm for young women wearing age appropriate clothing. But have you considered how hurtful and debasing it is to be told that you are dressing immodestly as a young woman?? This has happened to me when I was dressed perfectly well for my age and occasion, I have always had a large bust and always will, it is something I'm proud of, I don't flaunt it, I don't wear really low cut or tight tops, however a young man from my age group decided one day to comment on what I was wearing saying "don't you think thats a bit immodest?" just because he was taller than me and could see that my top wasn't covering my collar bones. Telling a young woman that what she is wearing is inappropriate can be cruel and callous, I suggest that if any of you are thinking about approaching that topic that you should think long and hard about the ramifications of the emotional pain you could cause.
ermm so are tank tops considered immodest ???? cause that is all i live in. although i always wear a cardigan unless it is hot then i go out in shorts and tank tops. great hut by the way.
I like it! I like it! Don't worry about the naysayers Doghouse. You are saying what plenty of others would like to say. Too many young girls are being allowed to dress too maturely. Parents of these girls need to realize that it is not more important for their daughters to fit in than it is to maintain their modesty and dignity. Society has become so tolerant of sexual exploitation that it is ruining the morals of young people. And because product makers are greedy and use sexual ideas to sell their clothes to these wanna-be grown-ups. Sex sells! God help us all for the future of our society. These kids are the future mothers and politicians! How can we survive morally and ethically if we end up with such a liberal society?
Great hub! This kind of advice and clothing is needed! Thanks!! :)
Here is an interesting twist. As a male teacher I find myself ignoring inappropriate dress in the warm months. It is a very subtle thing but if a male teacher says 'Hey Amy cover up your boobs are showing ' or I know what you are going to say, if I privately bring it to the attention of the administration, does not matter. The question is always raised 'why are you the male teacher looking' Out of self preservation I have learned to ignore the issue and never ever look or notice these things. Let the female teachers take care of the problem or, here's a thought, how about mom
Ultimately the more skin we show, the more available we make ourselves and that is truly a distraction to those around us and the opposite sex. http://ow.ly/1vHBS
This is a great read and the comments are interesting, too. I'd like to add a couple of things here. My daughter is now 20 but when she was about 8 it was very hard to find clothing where we lived (Eastern Ontario, Canada). Everything was lace see-through shirts, short leather skirts, crop tops etc. This is not cute. This is an invitation to predators. I even went so far as to make a complaint to Sears. The response was "we buy what people want". So we shopped in upstate New York, where kids were still allowed to look like kids.
I think Hilary Duff did a lot to change things around that time. Her line of clothing was 'cool' to an 8-year-old back then and it sure was welcome at our house, too!
Kids have always wanted to look grown up. Maybe we should show them a better way than what's out there right now in music videos, movies, and billboards.
You hit it right - it's about respect.
modest is hottest. seeing a girl that is modest makes me appreciate and admire them more. i just love my fiance's modest wedding gown that she has for our wedding.
I believe in modesty, especially in swimwear (I hate bikinis - they show too much on me,), but Muetti seems to wear immodest clothing, like Abercombie and Fitch camisoles! And we're Filipina Catholics!? Darn!
Actually modest clothes look the best. I think people buy immodest clothes because its all over the stores. I went shopping to a bunch of malls just to find a nice tee-shirt, but all I found was tanks tops and sleeveless shirts. That really disgusts me.
Immodest clothes not only look horrible but they don't have any good designs on it. It's just cheap basically.
Yes I total agree times change fast. I remember just a few years ago girls weren't dressing as they do now. I really think TV and reality shows have a lot to do with this. They promote drinking, sex, and showing more skin. Great article
Parents and teachers alike should address th kids and teens to the possible dangers of these "sexy" clothings.
This is one of the contributors to the increase of sexual harassment crimes.
I really love to be modest. because you respect yourself. I am now 15 yrs. old and the peer pressure is so strong! It is really good to think that I have friends in church that share my standards and dress modestly like I do. :)
I agree that modest dresses are the best variant for many prom girls.
If you are looking for modest prom gowns you should check out Twirl Prom at http://www.twirlprom.com
Good hub, but you could create a more well-rounded article by discussing the modesty issue and how other religions deal with it. Putting the Mormon view was good, but what about other religions? Catholicism? Islam? Put a few of the others out there.
Thanks for good topic, I really like it, modesty is important especially for teens. To need to have training modesty today in high school form dressing, personal appearance
Hello. Really LOVED this hub:-) You truly bring an inspiration to our women today. I would love to link to this article from my hub about modesty, if you don't mind. It would be great to join hands spread the word about dealing with modesty in this present times. Wonderful hub, interesting and useful. Just voted up! Thank you for this.
Sorry that I had to remove the last comment, I actually had submitted this one twice. More power In the Doghouse!
-Tonipet
Wow!This is really amazing!
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In The Doghouse Hub Author 4 years ago
Having raised a daughter that attended two different proms, I am here to tell you it can be done.