Utard and Other Mormon Jokes
Utah
Utah, the Mormon Mecca, home of the Utard.
Utah, the "Mormon Mecca", is located in the western United States. It was the 45th state to be admitted to the union, which happened on January 4, 1896. The name Utah is taken from the Ute Indian language and it means "people of the mountains." The Utah territory was first inhabited by Mormon settlers fleeing the persecution of the mobs in Nauvoo, Illinois which ensued after the death of their beloved prophet, Joseph Smith. Joseph Smith was murdered by an angry mob, while imprisoned in Carthage, Illinois, in 1844. Soon after, under the direction of Brigham Young, the migration west by the Mormon's started. Over the next 22 years more than 70,000 pioneers gathered in that territory to enjoy religious freedom and escape persecution from enemies.
Utah is the place? You've got to be kidding!
When the pioneers arrived in July 1847, Brigham Young declared,"This is the place", as he peered over the whole valley from the top of the mountain peak, in the mouth of Emigration Canyon. It was this wonderful view of sagebrush and desert that made him understand the meaning of the prophecy that would soon be fulfilled, that of "making the desert blossom like a rose." The saints of the church worked through difficulty and hardship to do just that, and have now seen the truth in that statement as they live in their lovely "State of Deseret."
You Must Be A Mormon IF...
- If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you live in Utah
- If you measure distance in hours, you live in Utah .
- If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you live in Utah .
Utah has the beautiful sound of Mo-Tab!
In the spirit of gathering they came from all over the world to live near the prophet of the church, who resides in the city which is the state capital, Salt Lake City. The city itself is located on the Wasatch Front, and is large enough to include two counties, Summit and Tooele. It is location for the headquarters of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. It is also here that the famous Salt Lake Temple is located and the Mormon Tabernacle Choir makes their home.
- If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction, you live in Utah.
- If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you live in Utah.
- If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you live in Utah.
- If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you live in Utah.
What in the heck is that Utard town called?
Utah has many interesting factors that set it apart from other places in the world. One of these factors is the uncommon names they have for towns and cities in their state. The names of Book of Mormon heroes are found to be common when naming locations. This adds a bit of distinction that is found nowhere else in the world. Utah is also the home of the famous Utah "poof hairstyle", but that discussion must be saved for another time.
Tour of Utah Towns 2005
Some Utard jokes show very bad form!
Being a "peculiar people", Utards have become the brunt of many jokes. Although Mormon's are considered "prudish" when an off colored joke may be told, in actuality they have a wonderful sense of humor and can often laugh at themselves. Unfortunately, when sacred issues are blatantly regarded "for a thing of naught" by others, they find the joke simply of poor taste or of bad form.
So remember laughing with us is different than making fun of us!
Utard is NOT REALLY a word...
Or is it? lol